Lindsay Lohan may have given up the booze, but that doesn’t mean she’s giving up the partying. The freshly sprung from reheb Lindsay isn’t wasting anytime getting back to the club scene.

From TMZ:

Meanwhile, as TMZ reported last night, Lindsay spent her first rehab-free night at Las Vegas’ Pure nightclub — quaffing Red Bull and water. Vegas Confidential reports that she played with Lauren Conrad and Brody Jenner, and that she was seen leaving with Criss Angel in his Rolls Royce, and then came back to her hotel late.

Oh the irony. The first time Lindsay is actually legally allowed to be in a nightclub and she doesn’t drink. But what’s up with her leaving with the Mindfreak guy? Yikes. And she wasn’t even drunk. Hmmm…drunk would have made it easier to explain.

Anything but ugly, Ugly Betty vixen Rebecca Romijn married her cute and cuddly beau Jerry O’Connell this weekend at a ranch outside of Los Angeles and Rebecca looked beyond gorgeous in this Ralph Lauren gown. I can’t say much for the groom though with his light grey suit, sneakers and please tell me that isn’t a paisley tie.

And while the two are all smiles and kisses here, I highly doubt Rebecca is planning to hyphenate her last name again. Of course that’s not to say Jerry won’t do it. Doesn’t Jerry O’Connell-Romijn have a nice ring to it?

Congratulations to the happy couple! And condolences to John “I’ll Never Get Anyone That Hot Again” Stamos.

And for your almost daily dose of celebrity summer bikini shots, here is Cameron Diaz hitting the waves at Malibu. And the water must be a little cold. I guess she’s looking pretty good. Of course without the communist propoganda bag or the freaky (and married…oops) magician on her arm, there’s just not much to say.

So what are we supposed to do with Cameron Diaz now? I mean you either love this chick or couldn’t care less about her. She’s kind of like Cheese Whiz. You either suck the stuff straight from the can or avoid it like the plague. Personally, I could do without both of them. Of course I wouldn’t say no to pictures of Cameron Diaz covered in Cheese Whiz.

And she’s out. You knew this day was coming (kind of like Armageddon) so here’s the official word. Lindsay Lohan has checked herself out of the Promises rehab center. She split the sober center on Friday the 13th…but let’s not read anything into that.

From People:

“On Friday, July 13, 2007, Lindsay Lohan successfully completed her 45 days of residential and extended care treatment at Promises. She has transitioned to an intensive outpatient program, which includes attendance at daily AA meetings, outpatient therapy and daily testing. On her own, she has also made the decision in support of her sobriety to wear an alcohol monitoring bracelet. In part she is wearing the bracelet so there are no questions about her sobriety if she chooses to go dancing or dining in a place where alcohol is served.”

Of course Lindsay got all clean and sober just in time to be hit with a threat of having (more) scandalous pics of her posted on the internet. Underground site celebslam.com is claiming to have naked pics of Linds that were reportedly taken by her her former boy toy Calum Best. Lindsay’s rep told Page Six: “Anything is possible. I know nothing about it, but her lawyers have been contacted.”

And welcome back Lindsay!

Apparently the Kelly Clarkson/Clive Davis bitch fight is turning into the music industry’s version of the backwoods feud between the Hatfields and the McCoys. Everyone who wants to be anyone is taking sides (and how’s that for clever?).

The latest loud mouth to offer his totally unsolicited opinion is American Idol mean judge Simon Cowell. And I’m sure Kelly is just thrilled to be hearing from His Crankiness again.

From TMZ:

Crabby Simon Cowell weighed in on the ongoing feud between Kelly Clarkson and Sony/BMG boss Clive Davis — and he’s firmly in the Davis camp. Clarkson and Davis butted heads over Clarkson’s newest album — with a catty Kelly saying to Davis, “You’re 80, you’re not supposed to like my album.”

Cowell fired back in Davis’ defense, reports Page Six. “Clive Davis at 80 is better than 99 percent of the people in the music business in their 20s, 30s and 40s … and he’s not 80 … [Davis] is the boss of the record company, and it’s his job to advise.”

Of course Clive Davis just happens to be the money behind the contract promised to the winner of AI, the show that pays Simon’s tight fitting t-shirt bills. So I don’t think Kelly’s too shocked. I, however, am totally blown away and bewildered by this stunning turn of events.

So here’s Kim Kardashian at the Mercedes Benz Fashion Week Show in Miami. And that’s pretty much all there is. It’s Kim K. showing off her ass(ets). Does she even qualify for this site? Yes, she’s rich and she’s fairly high on the hot list. Of course that’s mostly because “I don’t do that” doesn’t seem to be in her sexual vocabulary. But a celebrity? Come on. She’s the former BFF of a famous for no good reason celebutante and she had top billing in a sex tape. If that’s all it takes to be called a celebrity I’m just one public fight with Gary Coleman away from hitting the big time. Cause the tape is already made, baby.

It’s a Sunday so I’m really scraping the bottom of the celebrity barrel to find gossip for all of my adoring fans. And since I can’t find any hook-ups, break-ups, crack-ups or nudity…here are pics of Jennifer Love Hewitt on the set of Ghost Whisperer. And someone please tell me the costume designer has been fired. It takes a special kind of talent to turn hottie Jennifer into frumpy soccer mom.

Hilary Duff showed up on So You Think You Can Dance in an I Dream of Genie outfit and lip synched her way through a performance. I don’t actually watch the show, so I had to catch the video online. And by “had to” I mean it was there and my finger accidentally clicked on the link, then it accidentally hit play and then I accidentally sat through the whole wiggle, bump, slide routine. And I can never get those three minutes back.

Oh here’s a rumor to keep tongues wagging and comments flying. Is the world’s superest super couple planning to tie the knot? It’s being whispered that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are planning to make their relationship legal with a Spring wedding in Italy.

The Bosh has the scoop on their reported $220 million prenup:

“They don’t want anything left to chance,” an insider told The ENQUIRER. “They are straightening out all their financial arrangements before the big day so they can kiss at the altar knowing they have taken care of every eventuality.”

“They’ve loved Italy ever since they spent time there while on a break from filming, and they’ve talked about a small wedding in Tuscany of near George Clooney’s mansion in the Lake Como region,” divulged the insider.”

A $220 million prenup? That’s like the merging of two small countries. Seriously, all Brangelina needs is a flag and a postage stamp. Hell, I’d move there. Do you get adopted as soon as you get your visa?

So here’s your pretty fix for the day. Jessica Biel working the red carpet at the premiere of her new flick I Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. Of course Jessica’s big claim to fame in the movie is when she lets Adam Sandler’s character feel her boobs. But hey, any big screen credit is good, right? Although with her boobs being a bigger star than co-star Kevin James I would have expected more cleavage…and less ruffles.

Michelle Rodriguez may have been outed against her will, but she’s embracing the lesbo limelight and her gal pal as well. The Lost star is not only flahsing her love for the ladies, she’s also planning to launch her own clothing line. Wow…tank tops and boots anyone?

From USA Today:

[S]he says that she hopes to emphasize global awareness by integrating various cultures into the clothing line she plans to launch, which she plans to name Ishkadada. To prepare, she plans on visiting a dozen or so countries all over the world, with the aim to “study people, social classes, history, culture,” which the actress announced on the Sony channel’s “It’s Midday in China” program, which aired in Latin America earlier in the week.

Seriously, can she find militant lesbian chic in third world countries?

Lindsay Lohan isn’t letting a little thing like rehab keep her from her rumored lady love DJ Samantha Ronson. Celebrity Babylon is reporting that Linds has been lighting up MySpace with some girl on girl love letters to Ronson.

From Celebrity Babylon;

Here is an example of one late night MySpace message from Lohan to Ronson, “Your [sic] all I have to live for, babe. I want to marry you and have children with you.” Sources say that the 21 year old actress has also been in many fights over the web with the 29 year old Samantha, Lindsay types, “Babe don’t leave me I [insert "f" word] LOVE YOU!”

And the celeb blog continues:

Apparently there is not so much censorship involved online with the two girlfriends, on one occasion Samantha writes to Lindsay saying “You still have me. I’m here for you. With you” Lindsay simply replies with, “I love you. You love me. Why don’t we [insert "f"word] and make a family…”

Ok, first piece of advice for Lindsay…MySpace isn’t a high school hallway. Keep your fights and make up sex in the clubs and streets of Hollywood where they belong. Second, one of you two crazy gals is missing the right equipment to make babies. Third, are you really still on the lesbian thing?

Old pics of Lindsay hanging with Ronson.

So turns out Britney Spears isn’t dating her manny. The guy (Damion Shippen is his name) is just really helpful to have around. Not only is he a bodyguard and manny he is also an accomplisyhed baby catcher. This is the guy who famously caught Sean Preston when Brit nearly dropped him on a Manhattan sidewalk a year or so ago.

From People:

“He’s her bodyguard and manny,” says a source familiar with Shippen’s employment. “They’re not dating.” Shippen, a California native described by the source as “funny, but on the quiet side,” is “tickled” by the attention from the media. “But he really wants to focus on his job: taking care of the kids and of her,” says the source.

Well of course he wants to focus on his job. It’s rough work when you have protect the mom and then save the kids from the mom. Doesn’t that rate overtime…or at least hazard pay?

Paris Hilton may be a free woman, but the drama over her incarceration continues. The LA County Sheriff’s Department has started an internal probe (didn’t Paris get one of those?) into claims that the ex-con heiress received special treatment while she was locked up. Um…duh.

The New York Daily News is reporting that claims are being made that Paris got to use a cordless phone instead of having to line up with all the other chicks for the pay phone, that her mail was delivered by an officer instead of an inamte and that she got a nice new uniform rather than a dingy used one like everyone else.

Well color me shocked. A celebrity got special treatment. Please, I’m suprised she didn’t get a swag bag filled with crystal studded shanks when she checked out. But now that they’re “investigating” you know Paris just totally ruined jail for every other celebrity who gets busted and can’t talk their way into community service.

Lindsay Lohan may be planning to take over the world. The rehabbing celeb recently shared her new favorite book with Tattler Magazine. And the book makes me a little nervous. Turns out Linds is reading Machiavelli’s famous how to manipulate your way to the top tome “The Prince.”

From Tattler:

“It changed my life. I didn’t have a good grip on it and I needed to get my shit together. I was going out too much and I had too much pressure on my shoulders. I was not that happy and I needed to go to that place to be happy. If I get stressed out I say a serenity prayer. I meditate too. I was going out with someone and they said I should read Machiavelli and I was like, ‘nah’, and then I was, ‘OK, I’ll read it’ and now it is always with me.”

Um, are we absolutely certain that Lindsay isn’t actually reading “The Little Prince”? You know that cutesy book about a space traveling kid who meets a talking fox and stuff? Cause the idea of Lindsay reading Machiavelli is not only confusing, but frightening. Gving Lindsay Lohan a copy of “The Prince” is like giving a preschooler a shot of espresso. Sure stuff might get done, but it’ll be messy.

Time to move. Posh Spice and her handsome husband David Backham have officially landed in La-La-Land. Victoria and Becks are being welcomed today by the LA Galaxy soccer team and just in time for Victoria’s new reality show to hit the tube on Monday. What a stunning and completely unplanned coincidence.

So, consider yourselves warned, within a month Posh will be everywhere. You won’t be able to walk down a street in Los Angeles without having to duck those indestructible boobies of hers. Not that I would mind a quick bump into Becks…that boy is yummy.

Maybe you have heard that Britney Spears has been seen around town with a new man. Well, it turns out that Britney didn’t look too far to find her new boy toy. The guy she’s hanging with is none other than one of her bodyguards.

From TMZ:

Us reports that the heretofore mystery-guy’s name is Damon — no last name yet, — and he’s been seen all over town with Brit, carrying the kids, taking them to church, and making some private fireworks on July 4 — a “candlelit dinner at the Four Seasons’ Windows Lounge” and then a night at the Spears compound.

Did anyone else suddenly have “I Will Always Love You” pop into your head? And not the beginning…did it skip right to that big ol’ “IiiiiiiiEeeeeIiiiiiiiiiiEeeeeee Will Always Love You-ooooooooooo” part?

In today’s way too much information column, Transformers hottie Josh Duhamel tells Glamour Magazine that he and girlfriend Fergie recently had a stripper pole installed in their home. Uh, I’m all about seeing Josh in a speedo, but Fergie on a pole…not so much.

Here’s what Josh told Glamour about the pole:

“It’s just for fun. [Fergie is] taking lessons, but she won’t get on it until she knows what she’s doing, ’cause she doesn’t want to look stupid. I’m like I don’t give a s–t! I don’t care!”

I love the honest guy thought process here. At least Josh can admit that to a man, no woman looks stupid when she’s sliding on a giant metal pole.

But you know, hearing about Fergie swinging on a stripper pole is a lot like hearing about the time your grandma gave General Patton a lap dance. Good story, but a very bad mental image.

As if we didn’t have enough reasons to think that Jessica Simspon is an annoying blonde, here’s another one. Jess has reportedly been working hard on her post-break-up body, but now she’s also running her mouth about how she is working hard to get a bigger back end. That’s right, when the rest of us are trying to lose some of the junk in the trunk, Jessica wants more back.

From TMZ:

Jessica Simpson is working hard in Louisiana right now for her next film role — at what might most accurately be called booty camp. She tells Harper’s Bazaar (via People) that her trainer has “given me a butt … I have to do as many squats as I can to get a little booty.”

What’s more, she says, she might follow in little sis Ashlee’s footsteps and get some work done on herself, “if my boobs dropped down to my belly button.” But for now, she insists she hasn’t had any surgery: “I’m photographed every day of my life and have never worn any bandages or anything…”

Maybe that’s why Jess is checking out her tummy in these pics…she’s looking to see if her boobs have dropped yet.

Kelly Clarkson is living up to her Miss Independant rep. The first American Idol is still ready to throw down with record producer Clive Davis over her new album.

From TMZ:

Kelly Clarkson hasn’t lashed out publicly about her feud with music legend Clive Davis, but in a new interview with Blender magazine (via Page Six), she says she told Clive that he’s just too much of a geezer to get her music: “I get [that] you don’t like the album. You’re 80; you’re not supposed to like my album.” Clarkson and Davis famously clashed over what songs should be on Kelly’s latest album; Clive wanted to bring in songwriters, while Kelly chose to write the songs herself.

You know Kelly might want to be a little nicer to her boss. Clive might be 80 but the man has gone rounds with Whitney Houston. Face it, the guy’s hardcore.

Just for the record, I’m on Kelly’s side. You go on girl and write your own pop tunes. That will show the world that you’re a serious artist. It’s not like you just won some annoying reality show. Oh, wait…sorry.