David Beckham’s free day football program celebrated its second anniversary in London last year. Does it look like the first genuine smile you’ve seen from Becks in awhile? Probably because he’s surrounded by kids who think he’s a superhero, he’s in a country where people don’t boo him, and Posh doesn’t seem to be nearby.

Gwen Stefani was spotted shopping in New York at Prada with her assistant, Pete. Pete, you lucky duck. How many girls would kill for that position? How many girls would kill to be Gwen Stefani? She’s hot, stylin’, and sexy — no wonder Entertainment Magazine just named her one of Rock’s Best All-Time Frontwomen. Yeehaw!

Brad Pitt was set up to star alongside Edward Norton, Helen Mirren, and Jason Bateman in a movie called State of Play, but according to The Hollywood Reporter, he’s pulled out because of script concerns, which can’t be worked on because the writers are on strike. Hopefully this will force the studios to look up and realize that they’re losing more money on ruining this all star cast than they would if they’d just dole out more money to the writers. Amen!

So in between running red lights, neglecting her kids, and shopping for chandeliers, Britney Spears has had time to start dating a waiter named Michael Merchand at Mirabelle in Los Angeles. This photograph was taken outside of the restaurant, while Spears waited for Merchand to get off of a shift. As for the bruises? That’s anyone’s guess. However, according to Life & Style:

“Their chemistry was immediate. He’s very turned on by her,” says an insider. “They’re always texting each other.”

So perhaps there’s more brewing in that kitchen than food, darling. From the way she’s showing these black and blues off, it’s not something she’s ashamed of.

Rachel Bilson is one of the most adorable creatures on the planet, so even though there’s really no big news here, I’m posting her anyway. For like, eye candy, or whatever. Yes, even girls like looking at cute girls. So here she is with some mystery dude, strolling around in skinny jeans and a scarf and looking as laid-back-sophisticated as ever. I wonder who that guy is. Maybe she was taking him shoe shopping, because his shoes are pretty beat up.

Hayden Panettiere is GQ’s Obsession of the Year, which seems pretty surprising to me. I think she’s a really cute girl and all, but in the grand scheme of things she seems really — well, normal. This is one of the sexy pictures that the magazine will feature of the cheerleader. In most of them they have her looking sexy in little girl poses (hula hoop, holding a teddy bear), which is sort of creepy to me when paired with her girl-next-door sensibility, but whatever.

It’s unusual, I know, to see much about Jonathan Rhys Meyers, but here’s the second of two posts in a week. His mother died this past weekend in Cork, Ireland, just days after Rhys Meyers was arrested on a plane in England for being intoxicated and causing a ruckus.

According to OK! Magazine, Britney Spears’ divorced parents are banding together with their other kids in hopes of getting Britney back on track.

“Although her mom and dad are divorced, they are banding together for the sake of their daughter and their grandsons,” the family friend tells OK!. “Her sister and brother have been meeting with their parents to figure out the best way to confront Britney. They know she needs a huge wake-up call if she is going to be successful in keeping her children and putting her life back on track.”

Hmmm…maybe this was Britney’s clever scheme all along: to become a crazy, petulant, horrifyingly bad mother in hopes that it would unite her parents again! Brilliant! Oh Britney, I knew that vacant look was really the stare of a genius at work. Bravo. How Parent Trap of you.

According to People, Mary-Kate Olsen is being hospitalized for a kidney infection and should be out in the next day or so. This takes me by surprise — the Olsen twins have kidneys? Do they have hearts too? I thought that treasure trolls just have little jeweled belly buttons and too much static in their hair.

According to Just Jared, this is a photograph of Miranda Kerr leaving a boutique in LA with “oil heir Brandon Davis” which makes me giggle because I just posted on how Davis was at the Frederic Fekkai salon with hair so greasy that the shampoo girl wore gloves. Oh, the irony. Anyway, this might be scandalous because Kerr is supposedly dating Orlando Bloom, who cheered her on backstage at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show last week. Apparently, once Kerr spotted the photographers she unwrapped herself from Davis and walked the other way. Gorgeous model, mate with gorgeous British guy with clean hair and have clean, gorgeous babies! Stay away from the oily, carrot juice loving ex of Mischa Barton. Ew!

This photograph of Deborah Messing was taken at LAX this past weekend, while the actress spent time with her three-and-a-half year old son. It looks like they either a) came from some kind of tribal ritual in which Deborah Messing was a tent for hundreds of little children or b) they’d unexpectedly spent the night at an elephant’s house, and this was the only thing the hostess had to lend to Deborah. I’m partial to the elephant story myself.

Fergie looks gorgeous and *gasp* feminine here in a photo shoot for Allure magazine. Attempting to capture the old Hollywood glamour again, and this time actually succeeding. Ah, the wonders of good lighting, dainty lingerie, and Photoshop…

Despite claims that he’d given up drinking completely, Jonathan Rhys Meyers attempted to board a plane while completely drunk this past weekend, and was arrested by police in Dublin for “drunkenness and breach of peace.” According to the Associated Press, Rhys Meyers said the following in an interview for The Tudors last year:

“I gave up drinking a few years ago, and this is the first time I’ve spent time in my country trying not to drink,” he told The Associated Press in October 2006. “I would never drink again. It is hard to avoid. But listen, you do what you want to do. I don’t want to do that,” he said. “I want my career, and you can’t really do that and be successful on the screen.”

Looks like there’s a reason for all that scary wide-eyed shit he was pulling at the premiere for August Rush last week after all. Phew! Just another case of alcohol addiction; nothing like a little bit of rehab for that.

George Clooney is a good man, no matter what Fabio has to say. This past week, he donated $25K to writers and others who have fallen on hard times because of the strike. According to Variety

“‘To people like myself, the strike is a forced vacation, but with the rhetoric high, and two other strikes looming, there is the fear that a prolonged strike can destroy people who make a living in this industry,” Clooney, 46, said.”

Let’s see more support from everyone else, shall we?

Last night at the American Music Awards, Carrie Underwood won multiple awards, including “Favorite Country Album” and “Favorite Female Country Artist.” As usual, she looked cute and sweet as anything, so it’s too bad that her dress seems to have been torn up, then covered in some kind of sticky goop, and then covered with a flock of ducks. Otherwise, it probably would’ve been a pretty hot dress.

Ever since his mother’s shocking death a little over a week ago, Kanye West has avoided crowds and the paparazzi by staying home from events like the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show and even the memorial service. That’s why it was a surprise that he went through with his concert in Paris last Saturday, which was abundantly full of his usual energy until he got to the end of the concert, when he broke down upon dedicating a song to his mom. People says:

“He just cracked,” one attendee tells PEOPLE, “He was at the end of his concert and had just started to dedicate the song and then he just lost it completely.”
“He said the word, ‘Mother’ and just couldn’t go any further,” Le Parisien journalist Meddy Magloire said. “A back-up singer, the DJ and a guitar player came over to console him. It looked like he might collapse. He just couldn’t continue. He just stood there in a spotlight, crying while the band continued playing.”

West returned to the stage fifteen minutes later and finished up with a highly energized version of his song “Stronger,” which the crowd applauded wildly.

Tom Cruise will be making an appearance in Ben Stiller’s new movie “Tropic Thunder” which will be in theaters next summer. In it, he will, according to this photo, be bringing sexy back…complete with bald spot and pot belly. Because, really, what’s funnier in Hollywood right now than Tom Cruise’s desperation to have people like him? I wonder if Katie saw this picture and realized that this is what her future holds…

Looks like Simon Cowell doesn’t feel quite powerful enough! Even though he stands at a respectable 5′ 10″, Cowell wore these shoes with a little too much heel the other night while out on the town in London. It makes me wonder…if reality TV stars had to be on each other’s shows, what would that be like? I have a feeling Stacey London and Clinton Kelly from What Not to Wear would have a thing or two to say about this one…

I don’t know about anyone else, but Jessica Alba always talking about how she wants to be classy and known for her brains and toughness is starting to get on my nerves. If she’s so big on being known for her talent and not her hotness, why is she always half nekkid in magazines like Maxim? And why is she always in movies where she’s not exactly there to exhibit intelligence? According to Contact Music, Alba says:

I’d rather slay a guy with my fists than knock him out with the way I look. I know people like what they see and I’m totally happy to dress up and look sexy but I just see it as playing a part. “Underneath I’d prefer to be known for something else, like being tough or being smart. It makes me feel more confident to know I can hold my own in a fight than it does to look in the mirror and think I look beautiful.”

Jessica Alba, repeat after me: You are not Natalie Portman. You are not Diane Keaton. You are not Angelina Jolie. These are the woman who exhibit the things that you want. Be happy with your pretty face! Most women would kill to look like you.

Heidi Klum wore this dress for part of the night at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show. Funny, it seems like the kind of thing that someone would design on Project Runaway and she’d be all disgusted like, “I’m sorry, that is just distasteful. It looks like it is about to fall off!” I suppose since she had to wear underwear for the rest of the night, she was giving her butt a break by going commando. Super short skirt + very low backed dress + cold weather= something only a hot German girl could pull off.