Lindsay Lohan talks to Ellen about her breakup.

Lindsay Lohan took the morning off from her boy toy tour to discuss her lesbian breakup with Ellen on Ellen’s Show. After the show ceased, a ceremonial penis torching was performed by Rosie O’Donnell.

“I had no idea what was going on,” Lohan recalled of the days leading up to her admission to E! News that she and girlfriend Samantha Ronson were taking a break. “I just hadn’t seen her in like a week. She like, disappeared.”
But the split was not due to her roving eye or anything like that, Lohan said, as she began disproving her own comment about not being interesting.
“I don’t believe in cheating on someone.”

Ellen Degeneres proves lesbianism.

Portia de Rossi, Ellen’s wife came on the show. Lesbians everywhere are excited. You can follow Ellen on Twitter, and who cares? I’m bored.