So I am sure you woke up this morning thinking, “damn, thursday? What a sh#$tty day. Like it’s almost friday but it’s not friday. Today is going to suck balls.”

But then you logged on to CelebrityRumors.com and found that I have scavengered the Internet for all the very best Kate Upton photos. One set is from her shoot with Terry Richardson, whereas she did a bikini / nerd / sexy shoot. Then there are the outtakes from that shoot where she is nude, topless, (well mostly).

I don’t really get this Terry Richardson thing, how the heck does this weirdo get so many hot chicks to come in and do photoshoots half naked? Even Lohan did it. Wait, bad example. Maybe he has a creepy windowless van with cocaine treats? Wow, that was a crappy thing to say so early in the morning.

Then there are the pictures of her wearing a bridal bikini collection. Yep, bikini’s for bridal wear. How incredibly hot is that? Totally out of control. This may be her best shoot ever, and I’m not kidding.

So basically, my job is done. Your Thursday is now an amazing Thursday. When you are finished thinking about Kate Upton covering her boobs with her palms, you can think of what a great Internet friend I am. Enjoy the pictures.

The clock is still ticking on LeAnn Rimes bikini tour of the beautiful beaches of Cabo San Lucas. Just two days ago we reported this LeAnn Rimes bikini time. Don’t you love how I use the term “reported” to legitimize my place in the Internet world? It’s like, not only do I post amazingly hot sexy celebrity girls in bikinis, but then I also teach you all how to make yourself a legit Internet journalist pimp by strategically placing specific words that other real journalist use.

Ok, now that I have had my “me time,” lets get back to LeAnn Rimes bikini time. Obviously in the past she has been accused of being too skinny, so you gotta think this latest and clearly set up bikini photoshoots are a reaction to that. I hope more sexy celebrity women take notes. If us journalist call you too skinny, time to shed some clothes for us.

Like how I called myself a journalist? Then I see you were paying attention. Nice. But now it’s time to check out the bikini pictures. So enjoy LeAnn Rimes pictures.

So here is the Tweet.

#Pisces are tender and caring, but frequently become the victims of domineering and uncaring partners,” Rihanna retweeted.

And with that Tweet, the world stopped rotating and Rosie O’Donnell stopped eating. Wait, just kidding, Rosie is full steam of head buried in some toll-house cookies right now (at least I am betting and I doubt you want any action on that).  So yeah, the tweet makes sense to be targeting Chris Brown, her former ex boyfriend (we all know the rest here).

It just reminds me of young love. Man, I love young love. The ups and downs and way the hell downs and then a maybe and then a tweet. That’s young love.

Ok, on to something even more romantic. Short booty shorts with floral prints on them. Yep, we got ‘em and Rihanna is wearing ‘em…She is fantastically until she opens her Twitter and then it’s like, not sure. But let’s ignore the depths of her tweeting soul and just admire her tight sexy body. Lots of pictures. They are all for you. Please enjoy. And if you don’t enjoy them, please never come back because that means I hate you.

Dita Von Teese launched her new fragrance in London yesterday, she named the perfume after herself, because that’s what celebrities do, they start fragrances and name them after themselves. The bottle’s design is like an old looking bottle with a spritzer, like one of those bottles you’d see some chick with in a Bogart film. It’s chic. I like it.

Hey, I’m allowed here!

The interesting thing is how Dita came up with the fragrance. As the story goes, she was walking in the streets of Paris with her boyfriend and he asked her what she was wearing. He then said it smelled like his mother’s perfume. Dita was like ‘oh no he di-ent’ and then made one that only looks like someone’s mother’s perfume, rather than smells that way. Make sense? That’s how celebs roll, they just don’t like something and they redo it. Like Jessica Simpson doesn’t like an outfit so now she is a designer. Kim Kardashian has a fragrance because Jon Hamm would insist.

Ok, whatever, you get it.

Now to the goodies. Pictures. Dita Von Teese in London launching her perfume and cleavage to fans. You go girl.

It’s true, I have a soft spot for LeAnn Rimes. Even through the LeAnn Rimes cheating on her husband days. Even through the LeAnn Rimes too damn skinny malnutrition days. I have always held a soft spot for her.

And I have also always had a hard spot for LeAnn Rimes. Mainly for her bikini pictures. And now she’s back on the bikini saddle again as she’s vacationing in Cabo with stolen lover Eddie Cibrian. Clearly she is confident again about her body and I am confident on why she should be confident as I can confidently say that she looks good. I mean, this is a set up shoot, heck, in one of the photos she is carrying the damn camera herself. Who has tons of pictures of themselves in a bikini on the beaches in Mexico with their dude and trying to pretend they are not modeling?

Ok, Heidi Montag bikini fest.

But other than that, bet you can’t name anyone else?

Ok, Elisha Cuthbert in Cancun in a bikini.

I clearly just proved myself wrong, but in doing so, it was for the greater cause, which is providing you with 50 pictures of LeAnn Rimes in a bikini in Cabo. That’s two days (so two bikini changes) worth of material for you. Not bad for a Tuesday, eh? Is Tuesday not the most boring day ever? Like what is ever good about a Tuesday other than Fat Tuesday?

Enjoy the LeAn Rimes bikini pictures.

Miley Cyrus is continuing her post-Pilates picture tour for the whole world to see, and I for one have to say, I’m rather impressed. I just wonder if she does some makeup when she is finished because she never seems to be frazzled or sweaty in the least, which is not how I imagine her being. But then again, my imagination rarely leads her and I to a Pilates class, which may well explain why that is.

Of course, Miley has been doing the Pilates thing now for some time (click here for tons more Miley Cyrus yoga pilates body pictures) so it’s nice to see the results of her hard work. Or maybe this does remain a mission for Miley to not get dumped by up and coming successful Hunger Games actor, Liam Hemsworth?

I for one don’t care about all the technicalities, I just want us all to live in a world of bliss. A world full to the brim with Miley Cyrus’ abs. At this rate, I really want to see her get dumped, imagine how hard she’d work then? That might mean like P90X for downtime for Miley.

Check out the pictures.

Oh my, oh my, it’s just another manic Monday, as the Bengals would sing. Stressful, depressing, the girl in the cube next to me playing some Lady GaGa song while I am trying to creep around on the Internet. Ok, it’s really none of that to be honest. This Monday is just like any other day, I am creeping around online looking for amazing pictures of sexy celebrity girls.

And up to the plate…Rosario Dawson. Yes, Rosario Dawson of Sin City and Eagle Eye fame, took her talents to Washington D.C. for the 98th Annual White House Correspondents/ Association Dinner.

Any by her talents, I mean her incredibly, amazing, vivacious and bi-partisan cleavage. Rosario Dawson’s boobs, clearly capable of mending any divide and erecting policy. And by policy, I mean…. I assume you got that.

The 98th Annual White House Correspondents’s Assocation dinner actually managed something I thought would be impossible. It carried with it a guest list longer with hotties than the actual name of the dinner. I tagged all the ones we got, but here are a few notes from the creeper vault.

Sofia Vergara showed up looking totally elegant, like the girl you take home to mom and tell her you are totally hooking up with and post on Facebook every 5 minutes that you are tapping that.

Anna Paquin of True Blood, Kate Hudson of being a famous woman’s daughter, Zooey Deschanel of lame iPad commercial fame… all  also there. Enjoy the pictures and tell us what you think. And tell the girl in the cube next to you to cut that s@#t off….

Kate Upton attended the 98th Annual White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner (more on that in the next post where you will get all the sultry sexy cleavage fest shots in one big breakfast bowl). Kate also attended the pre-party. Because no party is a real party without a pre-party and no pre-party is complete without hot and sexy girls, or just one Kate Upton in a tight dress. That first part sounded like rap lyrics. Maybe I should start rapping instead of creepy blogging and manufacturing Internet sexiness?

Nah, I like this too much. I mean, that’s my job, finding Kate Upton in a sexy dress.

One thing worth noting in the pictures are the people watching Kate as she arrives. It’s like they are witnessing the resurrection of Jesus. Sexy Jesus. Kate Upton, angel: literally and figuratively.

Ok, let’s get on with today. The next post is going to be uber sexy amazing. Like I can hardly restraint my loins.

Now I feel gross for saying that.

Some of you might be wondering why I am not at church right now and why I’m instead working. Well, the truth of the matter, if you are interested, is that I am working…but it’s for God. I am doing the Lord’s work. That’s right, while some people are listening to sermons, I am finding the hallelujah all by me-self and pushing out angelic pictures on the web so that when people get finished donating to the offering basket they have an Internet full of Holy Boobs.

So there. And on to the worship.

Jordan Carver is doing a photoshoot to promote her new show, the real housewives of tit city. Not really, but she’s popping bottles poolside and wearing a rubber swimsuit while a professional photographer gets the digs. Ok, maybe not professional, but more like the creepy neighbor kid that just got a new Sony camera at Best Buy. And yes, that swimsuit has to be made of rubber, what other material would hold that huge rack of boobs? A material that is used to make tires for semi-trucks, that’s what material. It just makes sense. Jordan’s boobs could literally float the titanic.

I hope you enjoy these amazing Jordan Carver boob pictures. Because that’s what they were meant for. Pleasure. Sin.

Guys in the South, please don’t all go crazy at once when you look at these pictures. It may not be safe for your heart. Erections lasting more than 3 days should be labeled unhealthy and awesome.

Meet Jodie Gasson. She’s a UK model that’s been in magazines like Maxim and Fast Car. Of course she has been in a car magazine, I mean, how could that not make total sense? She has the body built to be laying over a cherry red Corvette with a white backdrop and she’s holding on to a bottle of Petrol. Instead we have her here fishing. The minnows should be in total fear.

But welcome to her new body of work: fishing. That’s right, Jodie Gason, who you probably had no idea existed until 2 seconds ago (or 5 minutes ago for some of you really slow readers), is now into fishing, or at least that’s what the photographer would want to have you think. Well, I am taking the bait.

Jodie is 23 years old. Here is her Model Mayhem profile. Yes, that’s how I roll. I do scholarly Internet discovery on hot and sexy girls while nude. Them, being nude. Ok, I really meant myself. I am actually nude right now, I admit it. Whatever, don’t hate. That’s just how I roll.